what is inner child healing?

Recently, I’ve had a lot of questions about Inner Child Healing from my clients and friends.  What is it? How does it work? How do I know if it might help me?  Here are some answers to those questions.

As children we are taught how to relate to others and how to gain love and approval.

During our childhood we absorb our parent’s habits, we establish our values, and we form our beliefs about ourselves and the world.  All of this becomes the foundation for our adult lives. If the foundation has problems in it then there will be problems our life.

Often when we are children we adopt the fears of those we love and we recreate painful experiences in our lives.

I have worked with men who fear success because their fathers were always working and were never there for them. I have worked with women who were afraid of commitment and intimacy because they feared being abandoned the same way mother was.  I’ve worked with men and women who were unable to trust themselves or others because of the betrayal they felt from their parents when they were children.

As an adult, you may find yourself repeating old unhealthy habits, re-living old experiences, or recreating old thoughts patterns that are no longer working for you. This may be due to the foundation that was created when you were a child.

Inner Child Healing is all about helping you rebuild your foundation so that it is strong and supportive. It helps you repair the wounds that are creating problems in your current life. Inner Child Healing is designed to enrich your life so that you can live fully, love openly, and let go without fear.

I want to be clear, Inner Child Healing is not about blaming your parents. Chances are pretty good that they were doing the best that they could with what they knew and given their experiences in life.

Inner child healing is designed to help you heal the wounds of childhood.  Once the wounds are healed it is easier to leave the past in the past and move forward with freedom, happiness, and health.

How do you know if Inner Child Healing is right for you?  If you notice one (or some) of these things in your life then you might want to give it a try.

  • When you feel abandoned, you experience fear
  • When you feel criticized, you experience shame
  • When you receive a compliment, you feel undeserving
  • When you experience love, you fear being hurt
  • You fear that you might do to your children what your parents did to you
  • If you shy away from commitment
  • If you are uncomfortable saying ‘no’
  • If you feel like your haunted by aspects of your childhood
  • If you wish your past would go away

It is through our inner child that we find our spirit.  If the spirit of our inner child is nurtured it promotes love, trust, and hope for the future.

Let me know if you have any questions, I’d be happy to help!

With love,

  • Lee

    Beautiful Gem,

    You are such a radiant and loving soul. This work is sooooooo important and I couldn't imagine doing it with anyone more loving, compassionate and wise.

    I will be sharing this beautiful post in my blog!

    hugs & love

  • Mike O’Hagan

    Thanks Gemma. It's a great insight into a very complex area and I notice my inner child feels happier knowing that I've taken notice of some of your points.

    You write with a clarity and compassion that is unusual in your field; sorry, but a few "folks" like to show what they know and can't help the "pride" thing emerging and hence there's an air of condescension (hope that makes sense) that mere mortals feel troubled at – but don't know why.

    Keep up the great work!

    All the best Mike

  • I agree with Mike… you write so beautifully. Your writing is free from the clinical language that so often dilutes real conversation.I understand me better because you let me glimpse through you.
    Much love,

  • This is so true, and exactly the way I feel.

    This is exactly how my life has been turning out, and I kept wondering why for years.

    Thank you for spreading the word! Hopefully, one day people will know better, and our lives will change.

    Keep changing the world, one person at a time.

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  • Nice post

    As we all know, there’s no single way of parenting. There are many ideas about how to rear children. Some parents adopt the ideas their own parents used. Others get advice from friends. No one has all the answers. Psychologists now know what parenting practices are the most effective and are more likely to promote positive development for their children. Parenting can be grouped into three different styles. These are different ways of deciding who is responsible for what in a family.

    Parenting that is authoritative usually does best in promoting positive development in their children. Authoritative parenting believes in rules that govern behavior, both their kids’ and their own; however, they explain the rules to their children and try to create partnerships with them. They feel that they are responsible for making their children understand why the rules of the family exist, and for helping their children develop the skills they need to govern themselves in appropriate ways. http://www.newportpsychotherapy.com/psychology_topics/parenting_styles_psychologist.html

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  • Hi Gemma, Love this post!  Nice to meet another inner child healing professional!  Warmest wishes to you!