Remember to love.

I was blessed with a mentor whose last words to me were, remember to love.

I shared the story of what those three words really mean, and how they have saved my life – and others at TEDxCanmore.

Watch the video here.

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When I studied psychology there were no courses on love. We learned about the mind, not the heart; the self but not the soul.

The roots of the word ‘psychotherapist’ can be translated into ‘attendant to the soul’. It’s time we return soul to therapy by remembering to love.

I want to live in a world where the foundation of therapy is love. A world where clients know that it’s love that brings healing and where therapists feel safe to offer their clients unconditional platonic love.

Psychotherapy works.

Forty years of research backs up my faith in the process. And yet, fewer and fewer people are seeking out the services of professionals and the use of medication to treat mental health challenges is on the rise.

I am not against medication to treat mental illness, but we know that therapy promotes greater lasting change, with less expense, and fewer side effects than medication. The future of therapy depends on us bringing more love into our therapeutic relationships.

If you are in therapy, I encourage you to remember that the therapist you choose is more important than the technique they use. Success in therapy has more to do with your relationship with your therapist than the techniques your therapist is trained to perform.  As you go into your relationship with your therapist ask yourself, on a scale of 1-10, how much love do I feel? And have a conversation with your therapist about it.

If you are a helping professional, I encourage you to focus on how you can bring more unconditional platonic love into your therapeutic relationships. When you are with your clients, ask yourself, how loved does my client feel? Have a conversation with yourself about it.

We are all in this together, and the only way to heal ourselves and our world is to remember to love.